Well today was the day.
We woke up around 4 am to the dogs going crazy at our neighbor leaving for work. An abrupt alarm if you ask me. There was stress in the air between he and I before our feet even hit the floor.
The baby was crying to be fed, the dogs needed to go potty, and we knew it would be an incredibly long day ahead.
As we were getting ready to leave, he needed to look for his stupid Covid card. So that caused undue stress to the morning (as it was in the back corner of his gear shed tucked away and hidden). We moved past that pretty quick though without tension, so that was good.
I was half asleep on the drive to the armory. I did finally wake up about an hour into the ride, and we had pleasant conversation at that point!
We picked up some of our favorite breakfast items from Mcdonalds. In a post shutdown era where most people hate their jobs, the lady at the drive thru was super duper kind! That made for a smooth breakfast and a wonderful highway meal together!
It was a nice morning at the armory. The kids had their tablets to play on and I was able to get some FRG stuff done with another wife from the unit.
Afterwards, I met up with a wife friend from the unit about an hour north. We planned that out because we knew we'd be sad to drop the guys off. We met with her, her daughter, and her grandparents for lunch. It was really special getting to know them, and to get to know her better.
I kid you not, I went to leave the restaurant and I got hit pulling out of the parking lot. In the vehicle we just purchased to get me through this deployment.
It wasn’t bad. Honestly, today has been such a brain fog that I truly don’t know if it was her fault or mine. It was a little old lady who hit me in my drivers side front bumper (just in front of my tire).
She was fine. I was fine. As she showed me the spot where we collided on her car, she pointed out that she'd recently had another collision incident. That was just an infuriating addition to an already stressful day. The day I happened to have dropped my man off!
It was a good reminder though that no matter what is going on around us, something can always happen. We ought to be thankful for life every day!
The kids and I went to our friends house after lunch. It was great to visit, as I wasn't sure I'd feel up to it (having had big emotions that morning).
The baby pooped out of her diaper and into her car seat... That was a gentle reminder that my hands were now beyond full.
I’m exhausted. I still don’t know what the kids and I are going to eat tonight. I need to go to the grocery store this weekend. We have an 8 am basketball game for my daughter in the morning that I have to lug all four kids to. And right now, every little thing is overstimulating me.
I'm trying to decide if it's a night to let the house go and just exist in the chaos. Or if I will feel better speed cleaning, cooking dinner, and getting all things in order.
I don’t know at this point what the right choice is. So I’ll lay on the couch and cry for a few minutes, pick myself up, and figure it out.
Cool thing is that many of my civilian friends actually remembered today was the day! They texted and totally checked in on me!
My mom even ordered me flowers! But the company decided they didn’t have enough inventory, and couldn’t deliver. So my mom told me to envision a beautiful bouquet with a sweet note from her and my daddy! Which I did when I got home.
I feel loved. I feel lonely. I feel pissed off and sick. I feel overstimulated, stressed, angry and hurt. Yet I’m proud of my man, and I’ll be here waiting when it’s time for him to come home!
Balls this is a hard day. But God’s mercies are new with each new day, and He’s not gonna leave me hanging!